“Being Sheela” is a biography of Sheela Murthy, an immigration lawyer, entrepreneur, and philanthropist based in Maryland. It charts her journey from a childhood in the bosom of a middle-class, military family in India, to a highly successful career as a Harvard-trained lawyer in the United States.
Author Adithi Rao beautifully brings to life the dynamics inside families – Sheela’s own as well as her husband’s, highlighting the unique qualities and subtleties of relationships, while exploring the conflicts and ambiguities within what are clearly very loving families.
Sheela’s personal story of growing up in a family of three high-achieving sisters (two of them are doctors), is a delightful tale weaving together the charms and challenges of Indian middle-class life.
Sheela’s story is one that needs to be told. In an America where immigrants have been under siege during the last four years, this memoir is particularly significant and meaningful. It’s almost a primer on how to navigate a complex immigration system and counter discrimination against H1B visa holders, or dependent EAD-4 spouses, green card families awaiting decisions that determine their future, and immigrants whose lives are on hold in the wake of aggressive immigration reform initiated by the Trump administration.
And therein lies its weakness. Rao does a terrific job stitching together the rich anecdotes that form Sheela’s early life. She understands the nuances of Indian culture and expectations and articulates those stories from an insider’s perspective.
That richness of detail and color is lost when the book turns its attention to Sheela’s professional life and philanthropic work. Rao seems intent on recording the minutiae of cases that form the cornerstone of the Murthy Law Firm which Sheela founded. But the narrative feels less compelling. Rao painstakingly covers case studies of Sheela’s work as an immigration attorney but pays less attention to the human side of Sheela as she makes decisions and does not fully explore why Sheela makes certain career and professional life choices.
It feels as though Rao is in a hurry to pay homage to achievements that are richly deserved, rather than offer insights into the transitions that propelled Sheela into her career and philanthropic journey.
Why did Sheela switch jobs or what made her finally decided to start her own firm which became the powerful Murthy Law Firm? The story skims the surface of her reasoning in a way that makes some of Sheela’s decisions, unfortunately, seem somewhat contrived.
Sheela found unique ways to deal with her client’s dilemmas. She has a reputation for helping women who are victims of violence and has made a difference in people’s lives. But Rao does not dig deeper into Sheela’s personality – the thinking and motivation that drives Sheela in these scenarios.
The book is similar in style to Michelle Obama’s “Becoming” – but unlike “Becoming”, it is not reasonable to assume that the reader is familiar with Sheela’s track record as a lawyer and philanthropist.
Her work for women’s causes and philanthropy is mentioned in passing throughout the book, but these significant contributions are quickly summed up within a few chapters. Adding more layers to this catalog of accomplishments would enrich the narrative with the same sensitivity and depth given to her personal story.
None of this, however, takes away from the remarkable tale of an intelligent, engaging, empathetic woman who has dedicated herself to others in what she calls ‘labors of love’.
Being Sheela is an inspiring immigrant success story that offers intriguing insights into the complex inner workings of American immigration policy.
Being Sheela: The Life Journey of an Immigration Lawyer; Adithi Rao, HarperCollins India,$34.87, 260 pages
Svati Kania Shashank is a lawyer practicing in New York for over 20 years.
Edited by Meera Kymal, Contributing Editor, at India Currents
Two years ago, I could not imagine cooking and eating oil-free food. Cooking good food was synonymous with a liberal splash of cooking oil in everything from simple sabji to biryani.
I loved cooking all my recipes with lots of oil, though I knew it was bad for my health. Every dish began with a bottle of cooking oil right beside me. As a foodie I relished food glazed with oil.
Homemade chakalis were my favorite. As a vegetarian, I assumed that oily snacks were okay, given my healthy vegetarian diet of fruit smoothies, brown rice, sambar, vegetables and beans.
But I often wondered why I was putting on weight despite my plant-based diet. In Atlanta, I met Shobha, and my perspective drastically changed. Shobha is an advocate of plant-based foods, inspiring folks to thrive on plant-based fare with zero oil! That simple conversation with her had a profound impact on me.
I joined Shobha’s WhatsApp group and my plant-based health education began.
I discovered that the persistent ache in my knees was inflammation from the excessive oil in my diet.
I was shocked to find out that all cooking oils, from soybean to canola oil are highly processed. High temperature and chemicals are used to extract oil, a process that make their nutrients go rancid.
When I learned that one tablespoon of oil has 120 calories, I nearly fainted. I felt so guilty! All that processed oil in my everyday food!
The more I discovered, the more I realized how little I knew about how cooking oil affects the body.
Processed oil is responsible for so many health issues – obesity, constipation, inflammation, heart attacks, and more.
And yet, the information you read on websites and news articles is really so confusing and overwhelming.
Are cold pressed sesame oil and coconut oil safe? Is olive oil as healthy as nutritionists claim?. And what about using “just a little oil’. Vloggers and sharers of recipes suggest 4 to 5 tablespoon of oil per pound of vegetables. Doctors and nutritionists urge folks to include oil in their diets, as oil fat is essential in the absorption of some vitamins, and the healthy functioning of cells and tissues.
So what’s the truth?
Our modern diet and lifestyle is driving the upsurge in diabetes, heart disease, and blood pressure. The reality is that oils have extremely low nutritive value. Both the monounsaturated and saturated fat they contain is harmful to the endothelium, the innermost layer of the artery, and that injury is a gateway to vascular disease.
So it doesn’t matter if it’s olive oil, coconut oil, or canola – my takeaway is to avoid all oil. And since diabetes and heart disease run in my family, I made an intentional decision to drastically cut back on oil in my everyday cooking.
At first, it was hard. I automatically reached for the oil when I started cooking. I had to really make a conscious effort to stop myself!
Magically, my WhatsApp group delivered. They shared amazing pictures of oil-free recipes and dishes.
In the span of few months I was cooking up a storm of tasty, zero-oil dishes, from upma to masala vadas, and cookies to cakes. No unhealthy oil!
Now, I’m on a roll. Here’s how.
In delicious cakes and cookies, I substitute applesauce and banana for oil .
I get healthy fats from fresh coconut, guacamole, almonds, walnuts and sesame seeds. My zero-oil channa masala and rotis are delicious. To sauté onions, I just use a tablespoon or two of water instead! Going oil-free has helped me to explore so many interesting food items and cooking techniques . Fortunately, my family loves it too!
I’m simply awed by the tasty and nutritious dishes I can make without a drop of oil!
Growing up, I loved deep-fried peanuts and spicy lentils. Now I simply roast sprouted green gram, channa dal and peanuts in the oven, and while it’s still warm, I mix in chili powder and salt. Yummy! My husband couldn’t believe it had no oil at all!
Studies show that Indian Americans have high rate of heart disease. In fact many vegetarians assume that they are thriving on a healthy diet, even though their food is rich in carbohydrates, fats, cholesterol and sugar. Sugar and all-purpose flour are white poison. I realize that cooking oil is colorless poison.
Once or twice in a week, I use cold-pressed sesame or peanut oil as they offer a healthier option than highly processed vegetable oils. Occasionally, I have a deep fried treat, during festivals and on special occasions, but no longer need to open my chakali box!
My mindful eating habits have produced a happy result – fortunately, I no longer suffer from knee pain and my weight has stabilized. I know my new plant-based diet with zero oil, and thirty minutes of exercise, is playing a pivotal role in my leading a healthy lifestyle.
Kumudha Venkatesan is based in Atlanta and often writes about the vegan lifestyle and spirituality.
Unfortunately, the state of California got a dismal C.
The Scorecard is a comprehensive analysis of where the state’s leaders stand on the environment and climate change.
Kalra was named Nature Defender by CLVC for championing AB 3030 in the state assembly, to preserve biodiversity and access to nature. He was recognized as “someone the environmental community can always count on to be the progressive leader and environmental champion that California needs.”
Kalra’s track record supporting a range of environmental bills on the assembly floor (buffer zoners for oil and gas safety, clean cars, and transparency within the Department of Toxic Substances Control), earned a 100% rating for two consecutive years (2017 and 2018), and a 99% in 2019.
Most recently he co-authored AB 1289, with Assemblymember Richard Bloom (D-Santa Monica), to help smaller family farms stay in business by transitioning from animal agriculture to sustainable plant-based agriculture.
Kalra stated that CLCV was his ‘go-to group “ for environmental leadership because they were helping combat the climate crisis with new, innovative proposals designed “to strengthen clean air and water for our communities.”
Mary Creasman, CLCV CEO, said that though California had a reputation for being progressive, 2020 was largely a year of ‘climate change inaction.’
Only 11 (nine Assemblymembers and two Senators) out of 120 legislators scored 100%.
Governor Gavin Newsom earned a score of 87% despite California’s poor track record on climate change initiatives last year, only because he issued executive orders at the year end to conserve biodiversity and boost climate resilience
CLVC said that the climate crisis took a back seat in Sacramento last year. For the first time, the annual Scorecard revealed that 70% of the California Legislature accepted campaign contributions from oil companies and major oil industry Political Action Committees (PACs). According to their analysis, 60% of Democrats and 100% of Republicans took these dollars.
Even though Kalra and a small band of legislators fought for climate justice, they failed to convince a majority in the legislature to pass bold policies. In reality, corporate interests are still calling the shots in Sacramento when it comes to the environment and public health, added Creasman.
“Corporate polluters continue to have an outsized impact on policy in Sacramento.”
With less than nine years left to address the most severe impacts of climate change, the California League of Conservation Voters is calling for renewed action in Sacramento and, in particular, the development of a comprehensive climate action plan for the state.
Mike Young, Political and Organizing Director at CLCV urged the Governor and the legislature to work together to renew their focus on the climate crisis. He pointed them to the Biden Administration’s climate action plan, with justice, jobs and public health at its center, nothing that “We need a vision for the future that centers the health and safety of Californians.”
CLVC called for California to create a clear climate action plan of its own, because “the country and the world is looking to California for leadership.”
California’s Overall Score: 74%
Governor Newsom’s Score: 87%
Assembly Overall Average Score: 71%
Senate Overall Average Score: 73%
Meera Kymal is a Contributing Editor at India Currents
Indira Ahluwalia is tall and graceful with a warm, welcoming smile. She’s the picture of wellness and good health, or so you’d think. Her story, however, is about an illness that inspires dread, but it’s a remarkable and inspiring one.
In 2007 Indira was told she had metastatic breast cancer which had spread to her bones. She did not have long to live. But since that devastating diagnosis 13 years ago, Indira has beaten the odds and has not simply lived, but thrived.
Her forthcoming book, Fast Forward to Hope, describes the tortuous, but ultimately awe inspiring journey through the dark crevices of her disease, and the toolkits for survival she developed which she firmly believes, contributed to her recovery.
“I remember the day I went to my gynecologist’s office so well,” Indira says. “I had coped with a terrible back pain for weeks and was walking around with a cane. I had an appointment with an orthopedic doctor but then a new symptom appeared. I felt this awful shaft of pain from the underside of my right nipple all the way up my arm; it was a live, electric wire thing, and it prompted me to make an appointment with Dr. Maser, my obstetrician-gynecologist, immediately.”
That trip led to an immediate mammogram which diagnosed her breast cancer and her doctor insisted she get a PET scan.
“I had already been through an MRI for my back pain, but without contrast, and it didn’t show anything. But when I had the PET scan, my bones just lit up,” Indira recalls. “Dr. Maser, an incredibly supportive doctor, came out and held my hand and said to me “promise me you’re going to fight.”
The full meaning of what it meant to have the cancer in your bones didn’t hit Indira till later.
“I visualized a tiny, pinkie size spot somewhere, and was horrified when I saw the spread.”
The process of getting the right diagnosis is one of the first lessons in Indira’s book.
“My father had colon cancer and we were very conscious of taking care of our health and testing on time. I began having colonoscopies when I was 35. But I was 38 and had never had a mammogram. I simply didn’t see the connection or imagined it was a risk at my age. I didn’t know at the time that there is a genetic connection between colon cancer and breast cancer. It’s important not to underestimate your risk in any area, was the first lesson I learned. It’s also important to get every technologically advanced current diagnostic test done. My MRI without contrast hadn’t picked up the cancer in my bones.
Her second lesson was about the will to survive. At the time, her children were young: her son was 3, her daughter had just turned 5. After going through every stage of grief – denial, shock, anger and finally, acceptance, – Indira came to the conclusion that dying before she raised her children was simply not an option.
“You have to believe in what you want the outcome of your illness to be,” Indira says. “I had a simple choice – living or dying – and I was determined not to die. You also have to commit yourself to healing and not let a feeling of powerlessness or helplessness overtake you. I had some very low points in my treatment, when I had to actively cultivate my faith in the positive outcome I wanted – beating back the cancer. There is an enormous capacity all of us carry within us for self-healing and we need to believe in it, with gratitude and humility.”
Indira’s strong conviction about the healing power of positive thinking is borne out by recent research that supports the power of optimism and faith in changing the course of serious illness. She also found that being open about one’s suffering and disease brought enormous rewards.
“The first thing that comes to my mind from my ordeal is the goodness of people,” Indira declares. “I knew there was a stigma associated with cancer, but I was open about my illness and I was overwhelmed by the response I got from all sorts of people – friends, family, staff, clients, my children’s Montessori teachers, unknown strangers. She believes that given and opportunity, even random strangers offer unconditional kindness and compassion.”
She recounts a particularly moving incident. On a cab ride from her office in Ballston, the cab driver surprised Indira with a, “Oh, my God, it’s you!” He explained he’d driven her home some months ago, “…. you were talking to your doctor and you’ve been in my prayers ever since.”
“It was the simple humanity of his words which really touched me,” Indira says.
“Another of my primary anchors was my faith,” affirms Indira. “I believe in the Sikh tenet of Chardi Kala which is, essentially, cultivating a state of eternal optimism as one goes into battle. And I was going into battle with my cancer, with all the resources I could muster, including my state of mind.”
Her doctor told Indira he had used her first diagnostic scan from thirteen years ago and her most recent scan, to teach a class of medical students. He presented them as scans for separate individuals. His students diagnosed the thirteen year old scan as that of a patient unlikely to live, but gave the latest scan a great prognosis. His students were astonished when they heard that both scans belonged to the same person.
“My doctor told me that they needed to bottle the magical elixir I’ve used to beat back my cancer and distribute it to all his cancer patients,” Indira recalls.
“I’ve tried to share what I learned about my magical elixir in the book,” Indira says.” Writing it was a cathartic process and it lays out the essentials in terms of harnessing the science of your disease along with your faith and your social network, and creating your personal anti-cancer army. I really hope I can help others who may be going through a similar trauma. My advice to them: choose yourself and visualize your cure with all your heart.”
Indira’s book, Fast Forward to Hope, will be out in late April 2021 and will be available on Amazon and in Barnes and Noble and local bookstores.
Jyoti Minocha is an DC-based educator and writer who holds a Masters in Creative Writing from Johns Hopkins, and is working on a novel about the Partition.
Edited by Meera Kymal, contributing editor at India Currents
Dig-In Meals – A column highlighting Indian spices in recipes that take traditional Indian food and add a western twist!
Pre-Covid, when my son was visiting Cambodia, he described his visit to Angkor Wat saying he noticed parallels with Indian temples that we had visited, seen in movies and read about. His guide showed him twin bas reliefs, hundreds of meters long, depicting sculpted scenes from the Ramayana and Mahabharata. Devas and asuras exist in the form of gigantic sculptures, standing, enormous legs braced on the ground, as they pull the serpent Vasuki as a rope, and churn away at the Ocean of milk.
This got me thinking about Cambodian food and my son said that it was all about contrasts-sweet and bitter, salty and sour. Influenced by their neighbors, Cambodian cuisine includes noodle soup similar to Vietnamese phở, salads and sour soups commonly found in Thailand, noodles and stir fries handed down from years of Chinese migration and Indian-inspired curries.
Cambodia’s national dish is Fish amok, a fish curry that gets its signature flavor from kroeung, an aromatic curry paste made with lemongrass, galangal, fresh turmeric, shallots, garlic, and a little chili. The kroeung is mixed with coconut milk, which turns a beautiful golden yellow. Mild white fish and shredded kaffir lime leaves are added to the curry, which is steamed in a banana-leaf cup. Being vegetarian, I made a meatless version.
So, till we can visit Cambodia and immerse ourselves in its culture and fascinating history, stroll through the night markets of Siem Reap, and get lost in the famous Russian market of Phnom Penh, let’s experience Cambodia through its food with recipes we recreate at home.
Nime Chow (Fresh Cambodian Spring Rolls with Peanut Dressing)
1 ½ ounces uncooked cellophane noodles
12 (8-inch round) sheets rice paper
2 cups thinly sliced lettuce
1 cup grated carrot
1 cup fresh bean sprouts
12 medium basil leaves
1 cup hot water
¼ cup granulated sugar
½ teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons lime juice
1 tablespoon white vinegar
1 tablespoon fish sauce (for vegetarians omit the sauce)
1 large garlic clove, minced
½ cup finely chopped unsalted dry-roasted peanuts
Combine bean threads and 2 cups hot water in a bowl; let stand 10 minutes. Drain; cut into 2-inch lengths.
Add cold water to a large shallow dish to a depth of 1 inch. Place whole rice paper sheet in the dish of water. Let stand 30 seconds or until soft (but don’t over soak because then it will tear easily and be harder to work with). Remove sheet from water.
Place rice paper sheet on a flat surface. Place lettuce, arrange 2 tablespoons grated carrot, 1 ½ tablespoons bean threads, 2 tablespoons bean sprouts, and 3 basil leaves over lettuce. Fold sides of rice paper sheets over filling; roll up tightly, jelly-roll fashion. Gently press seam to seal; place, seam side down, on a serving platter (cover to keep from drying). Repeat procedure with remaining rice paper sheets, lettuce, carrot, bean threads, bean sprouts, and basil.
Cut each roll in half crosswise.
To make the sauce, combine first 3 ingredients in a small bowl; stir well. Cool completely. Stir in remaining ingredients and serve with the rolls.
Meatless (Vegetable) Amok
All my ingredients are from Angkor Foods. They are local, fresh and authentic in taste and texture.
Make the Paste: Peel the onion and garlic. Roughly chop all the ingredients and toss them into a food processor or blender. Blend until they all become a paste. Add oil/lime juice as needed.
Fry the paste for 3-4 minutes until the aromas are released. Add the coconut milk and simmer for 20 minutes. While simmering, add additional Keffir lime leaves and lemongrass to really infuse those flavors into the Amok.
As the paste is simmering, pan fry your tofu. Add soy sauce or salt and season to preference.
Add the vegetables to the curry. Let the mixture simmer for an additional 5-10 minutes until the vegetables are soft. Add additional milk to keep the consistency from getting too thick.
Taste as it is cooking and season as needed. Add more sugar if the mixture is too bitter.
Cambodian bai cha (fried rice)
4 eggs beaten (optional)
½ cup carrot finely diced
½ cup french beans finely diced
3 garlic cloves minced
1 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 teaspoon salt
4 cups cooked rice separated
1/4 cup spring onions sliced
1 tsp sesame oil (optional but preferred)
Heat a little vegetable oil in a wok add the eggs to the wok and swirl around to make an omelet. When the omelet is just cooked through, remove from the wok, allow to cool a little and slice into bite-sized pieces. (If you don’t eat eggs, leave this step out and proceed to the next step)
Heat the sesame oil, add the garlic and fry for one minute, add the carrots and beans, cook till they’ve softened a little but still have a bite to them (al dente).
Over high heat, add the rice, sugar, salt and soy sauce and stir-fry until all the rice has been incorporated into the mix and has taken on a little color.
Mona Shah is a multi-platform storyteller with expertise in digital communications, social media strategy, and content curation for Twitter and LinkedIn for C-suite executives. A journalist and editor, her experience spans television, cable news, and magazines. An avid traveler and foodie, she loves artisan food and finding hidden gems: restaurants, recipes, destinations. She can be reached at: email@example.com
2020 has been a challenge for all of us and will be etched in our memory for our lifetime.
Painting was always on my bucket list and in February 2020 I decided to enroll in art class. But as luck would have it, just after 3 classes, COVID happened. My art teacher asked me to continue practicing painting with the advice “Just believe in yourself and you will do it”
March 2020 arrived and gave the whole world the gift of time with nowhere to go. After much soul searching, I decided to devote an hour or so every day to pursue my passion for painting. I realized there is nothing to lose and I would improve by learning from my mistakes. I decided to paint for an audience of one – myself.
My first painting was in March 2020 when ‘Stay at home’ was first announced around the globe. I decided to paint to bring calmness and peace to my anxious mind about the uncertainty looming around the global pandemic. I decided to paint Ganesha, the remover of obstacles, as I always visualized that Ganesha up there was guiding me and watching out for me. Painting was like meditation and was truly therapeutic, engaging the brain cells in a very unique way.
The best part was that I was very inspired by my first effort and decided to continue painting. I am truly grateful for the encouragement from my hubby, daughter-in-law, daughter, and son. Their honest feedback and the perfect gift of an artist table on Mother’s Day helped me to better focus on creating artwork.
I shared pictures of my artwork with friends and family via social media. My next-door neighbor was very impressed and asked if I could paint Ganesha for her. Suddenly my passion and free time had a purpose. One thing led to another and in the span of 365 days, I have created over 100 paintings and shared or gifted over 85 paintings with neighbors, coworkers, family, and friends around the globe.
Beside Ganesha, I challenged myself to line art with topics that evoke serenity – like ‘Newborn bond,’ ‘Meditation,’ and ‘Gratitude.’
My newfound passion was a perfect win-win situation. I had an outlet for my creativity and found purpose while hunkered down at home, while my family and friends enjoyed my artwork in their home.
I was touched by their comments; ‘Your aura comes through in the paintings of love and laughter,” “The meditation painting reminds me that no matter what is going on in my life, I can find peace,” “You inspired me to start painting again,” and, “I will keep your Ganesha painting next to my Allah to bring peace in this world.”
It was humbling that my artwork could bring joy and happiness to brighten the life of my near and dear ones. The icing on the cake was when my Mom asked me to paint a Ganesha for her 80th birthday celebration.
While we cannot control what life throws at us, we can control how we react to it. Life is all about finding joy and happiness in those situations.
I have transformed my very lonely dining room into a lively art studio. This corner of my house energizes and brings serenity at the same time. The vivid colors remind me of the blessings of beauty from Mother Nature, and serenity comes from the knowledge that a superior power is always giving me the strength to face any obstacles in life or removing them for me
Twenty years from now, I hope to look back to my COVID phase as the time I discovered a new passion in my life and proudly say that I am a COVID-born artist!
Hema Alur-Kundargi is a registered dietitian, culinary artist, and is determined to be a lifelong learner. Find her at @theculinarydietitian
Holi is a popular ancient Indian festival celebrating the onset of spring, the celebration of positivity, and the triumph of goodness. Over time this festival has garnered a lot of popularity and is now celebrated in many places across the globe.
Many of us look forward to Holi, the festival of colors, with both pomp and gaiety. With these quick and easy ancient home remedies, you’ll be confident in your pre and post-Holi skincare regime.
Do it Right
“Pre-Holi we advise prepping your skin. Face oils or sheet masks offer your skin ample moisturization and hydration. Sandalwood oil, Rosehip seed oil, and Coconut oil are excellent to improve skin elasticity, while sheet masks work great for oily skin. This can also be done post Holi. Additionally, dab a damp cotton ball in freshly squeezed lemon juice and apply all over your face and wash off once dry. A sunscreen with a good SPF is always a must,” say Tanushree Ishaani D and Pooja Karegoudar, Founders,BodyCafé.
Tanushree Ishani D
Bathing Bar from Body Cafe
Do It Yourself
The biggest challenge post-Holi is removing the color stains and dryness. Splash your face with a lot of cold water and apply cleansing milk to remove excess colors. Follow it up with a gentle facial massage with some coconut oil, allowing it to sit on your face for a little while and wash off with a mild foaming face wash. Those with acne-prone or oily skin can substitute oil with aloe vera gel.
“We do not advise exfoliating or using scrubs on the face as it can aggravate any damage or skin irritation,” warn Ishaani & Karegoudar. “Although we do not recommend scrubs for the face, mild homemade scrubs on the body helps remove colors easily. Natural Ubtans (homemade packs) help nourish skin from within and regain its PH balance and radiance.”
“Mix 2 tablespoons of turmeric, lemon juice, honey, and curd and apply on face and body. Another Ubtan option is applying a paste of lemon juice, ripe papaya, and a spoonful of milk powder. Ideally, packs must be kept on for at least 20-25 minutes and rinsed off with cold water. Apply generous amounts of lotion or body butter on the entire body to restore depleted moisture and nourishment,” advise Ishaani & Karegoudar.
At The Tribe Concepts, founder Amritha Gaddam suggests, “An important part while making a DIY face pack is to understand what your skin needs. Choose the ingredients that offer benefits to your skin type and know your allergies. If your skin type is dry, use hydrating ingredients like rose and aloe vera whereas if your skin type is oily, stick with ingredients like Fuller’s Earth to make the best DIY mask.”
One of the most common complaints is excessive hair loss after Holi. The itching in the scalp is caused due to color debris and harsh chemicals present in the colors.
Anita Golani, Founder,iORA, a DIY Salon Kit Series explains, “Oiling your hair is a must. Make sure you generously oil your hair with coconut oil or any oil of your liking.” The main aim is to let the oil seep into your hair roots to prevent scalp allergies or damage.
“Use a leave-in conditioner or nourishing hair serum if oiling seems too much for you. Be a fashionista and wrap a bandana over your hair. You will not only look cool but also prevent the color from directly touching your hair. Going for a deep conditioning session both before and after Holi celebrations is a pretty good idea too. Wash your hair immediately after coming home post-Holi with a herbal or organic shampoo. Be thorough and make sure to take your time to wash your hair properly to remove all the residual color settled on your scalp. Cut your split ends off if you have any. The dry Holi colors tend to intensify frizziness.”
The mantra is simple – use natural products and masks for your hair and skin care. “So, pre-Holi, you can make a simple yet super nourishing hair mask by combining egg yolks, lemon juice, yogurt, amla powder, and coconut oil. Leave it for at least 40 mins. Almond oil is a great additive in place of coconut oil as it helps the colors to get off easily post-Holi,” adds Golani.
The ears are prone to get infected with colored water and since the structure of the ears is a little complicated, it becomes difficult to remove residue from them. “It is important that you protect your ears by covering them with a small cotton ball. This will help keep your ears safe from any water or color entering them. The eyes must be specifically protected during Holi. I will strongly recommend that you sprinkle a few drops of rose water inside your eyes. Place a cotton pad soaked with some more rose water over your eyes and after five to ten minutes, wash your eyes with normal water and you are good to go. Rosewater is a natural coolant and its application will protect your eyes from any unnecessary eye infection,” says Radhika Iyer Talati, Founder,Beauty By Anahata.
Wear cotton clothing when you venture out and make sure you layer well, and that your clothes also cover your body completely so that no color enters your skin and damages it.
Have fun this Holi! But don’t forget your hair and skin.
Rub ice on your face before stepping out to play Holi. Rubbing an ice cube for 10 mins closes your pores so that the colors don’t seep into your skin.
Mix together coconut oil + castor oil + almond oil in equal quantities and massage well into your face. This super moisturizing oil blend creates a barrier between your skin and the Holi colors. Plus, it’s easier to take these colors off once you are home.
Do not forget to apply sunscreen on your body to prevent tanning. Wear a non-sticky, matt sunscreen that will last all day.
Apply two coats of dark nail paint to prevent unnecessary nail staining and cuticle concerns.
Keep your lips hydrated and protected from all the harmful colors by simply applying some good old petroleum jelly.
Stay away from soaps and face washes as they are chemical-based and can disturb the alkaline balance of your skin. Go for organic soaps and cleansers instead.
Revive your skin’s health with natural face masks or DIY face packs.
Stay away from excessive scrubbing to remove the residual color from your skin. Try gentle methods such as oil-based clean-up and wipe the colors off your skin.
Apply moisturizer every night to restore the moisture sucked out because of all the toxic and dry colors.
Bindu Gopal Rao is a freelance writer and photographer from Bangalore who likes taking the offbeat path when traveling. Birding and environment are her favorites and she documents her work on www.bindugopalrao.com.
Photo by Bulbul Ahmed on Unsplash
The year’s most-awaited summer blockbuster – the upcoming inspirational sports drama Toofaan, produced by Excel Entertainment in association with ROMP Pictures, will globally premiere on Amazon Prime Video.
Vijay Subramaniam, Director, and Head, Content, Amazon PrimeVideo said,“Excel Entertainment has been an integral part ofour India journey and we treasure a long-standing relationship with them. Toofaan marks another exciting chapter for us together. Toofaan is one more step in our continuous commitment to bringing quality entertainment to our customers and another excellent addition to our direct-to-service film selection.”
“The film is an engaging and inspiring tale of the power of perseverance and following ones’ passion against all odds. With Rakeysh’s flair for narrating stories with a unique appeal and Farhan’s ability to make every character he plays appear relatable and endearing, we are sure that Toofaan has all the makings of the perfect summer blockbuster and will be loved by our consumers across the globe. A story that is as intriguing as ever, we are looking forward to bringing this sports drama to Prime members this May,” he added.
Ritesh Sidhwani, Producer, Excel Entertainment shared his excitement. “At Excel Entertainment, we always try to tell stories that touch the heart and soul of the audience,” he said. “We consistently strive to develop new concepts which can entertain and enlighten the viewers. With Toofaan, we are presenting an inspirational sports drama that presents the story of a goon from the streets of Dongri set against the backdrop of boxing, his fall, and triumphant comeback against all odds in life. Excel Entertainment in association with ROMP Pictures is very thrilled to announce this special film. Our long-standing partnership with Amazon Prime Video has been brilliant and Toofaan is yet another exciting chapter and association for us at a global level.”
Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra, who once again is collaborating with Farhan Akhtar after the grand successofBhaag Milkha Bhaag, stated that, “After working with Farhan in Bhaag Milkha Bhaag, I was certain that he would be the perfect protagonist for Toofaan. The best thing about him is that he does not act the part, but lives it completely. Toofaan is a story that will motivate and inspire all of us to get out of our comfort zones and fight towards achieving our dreams. We cannot wait to present our film to viewers across the globe.”
Vindhya PV is a passion-driven journalist who hails from Calicut, Kerala.
From Surabhi’s Notepad – A column that brings us personal essays and stories, frivolous and serious, inspired by real-life events and encounters of navigating the world as a young, Indian woman living outside India.
Today, more than ever, we need creators who leverage their voice to talk about important societal causes and Ram Devineni is one such creative. A documentary filmmaker, technologist, and founder of Rattapallax– a not-for-profit organization focused on documentary films, poetry, and transmedia storytelling, Ramhas been named a “gender equality champion” by UN Women for creating Priya– India’s first female superhero who is a rape survivor. He is the co-creator of an award-winning comic book series based on this character.
In December last year, he released a new comic book and a short animated film based on this character titled “Priya’s Mask”. With a focus on the COVID-19 pandemic, the 2-minute animated film shows how Priya befriends a little girl named Meena and teaches her about the sacrifices made by frontline healthcare workers while instilling courage and compassion during this difficult time.
For ‘Surabhi’s Notepad’, in this month of women, I interviewed this award-winning filmmaker to learn more about the creative process behind the film, his inspirations, the beautiful message of coming together of India and Pakistan amidst this health crisis, and more. I also speak to Rattapallax Producer Shubhra Prakash briefly to better understand the editorial process for “Priya’s Mask”.
I understand that the idea to create Priya came to you after the horrible 2012 gangrape in Delhi. Can you share more on why you felt the need to create this symbol and how you think it helps create awareness and empower women?
RD: The idea to create “Priya’s Shakti” comic book series came after the horrible gang rape that happened on a bus in New Delhi in 2012. I was involved in the protests in Delhi and I observed gender-based violence was a cultural problem. I also realized after talking to survivors that there was a lack of support among society for the survivors of gender-based violence. I created a female comic book character who can reach young audiences. My goal was to change people’s perceptions at a very early age about the role of women, and especially their perception of survivors.
Priya is India’s first female superhero and a survivor of gender-based violence. We created an empathic and powerful character that is relatable to both girls and boys. Priya challenges deep-rooted patriarchal views and the role of women in society, and through the power of persuasion, she is able to motivate people to change.
One of our main goals is to teach teenage boys with the series because they are going through a critical age when they are learning about gender relationships, violence, and sexuality. That is why we create a strong female character in a comic book format.
Can you share more on the creative process of conceiving the character Priya – her looks, her ride, and for Saahas: The Tiger – her voice, and traits?
RD: For both characters, we went through many different names and Priya just felt right. I wish I could give an elaborate answer, but the sound of her name resonated with many people. Her name also translates to “love” or “beloved” which was very important because her mission is out of love and not anger. In the first comic book, we did not have a name for the tiger, and only in the second comic book, “Priya’s Mirror” did we name the tiger Saahas. Saahas means courage and is Priya’s friend and inner strength.
We created a “look-book” for each comic book with a collage of images, colors, and aesthetics we want to feature in the stories- these helped the illustrators with the initial designs.
In the pursuit of fighting against crime against women and gender equality, Priya’s Shakti- the comic book has been also recognized by the UN. Priya is the first-ever Indian female superhero- why do you think no one thought of creating a female superhero before- what does that say about the mindset of creators in India today?
RD: I am surprised too because there are many strong female characters in Indian mythology and Bollywood films have a comic book melodramatic aesthetic to them. So, it was strange it took this long. Comics only recently had a resurgence in commercial mainstream media and Hollywood, so maybe it would have eventually happened in India.
Tell us more about Priya’s Mask- the new comic book and short animated film in this series. What was the creative process like and what was the inspiration behind this?
RD: Priya returns in the new comic and short animated film, “Priya’s Mask.” She has been re-imagined as a teenager, but still is fierce and strong. The new edition is for a younger audience and will dispel misinformation about Covid19. The pandemic has challenged everyone, and the level of fear and uncertainty is very high. Priya’s message has always been about conquering your fears in order to find strength. Priya shows us why it is important to work together to defeat the virus and basic safety practices like “wearing a mask for your safety and mine.” Lastly, we focus on the emotions children are going through during this turmoil.
I think Meena in the comic book expresses her anxiety really well about the pandemic — she has no one to talk to and share her emotions. Priya tells her that she needs to be strong so others can be strong. In these uncertain times, fear can overtake us — but stay strong so you can support your family and community. Things will change, and get better.
The entire team worked remotely in multiple cities in different time zones from New York to New Delhi. We organized the project on Zoom and then worked independently in our houses and apartments. Even the actors’ voice-overs were recorded remotely, and we finished everything in 3 months.
I understand that Rattapallax Producer, Shubhra Prakash wrote this comic book series. Could she share more on the writing and creative process?
SP: Priya aligns with my macro vision of mainstreaming the brown girl narrative globally it is something I am passionate about – so the connect was instant – her origin story is positive and empowering subverting the victim shaming syndrome usually associated – a desi girl with superpowers on a flying tiger, yet rooted and authentic to the core – in a climate where the gender and diversity dialogue is so activated someone like Priya brings with her so much relevancy and stands a chance to become a true role model – more importantly we need someone like her right now. And that visual of her on Sahas is a game-changer.
I live on my own and have been isolating since March 10 as I got a bit of a cough – just about the time when the first COVID case hit the city. The 1st month was blurry and fairly surreal and involved lots of Netflix and discomfort as one adjusted to domestic chores – the no help situation, the hygiene of the pandemic, and of course sorely missing family. Month 2 was about wrapping one’s head around the new normal – strange things such as ZOOM and House Party. Month 3 onwards somewhere I began to make peace with the situation, work conversations energized too around the same time which was a big help – from then it’s been weird but okay. Dealing with losses – our own or people we don’t know continues to be tough – so keeping one’s mind out of the rabbit hole is an everyday process. I did not bake banana or sourdough bread.
The 2-minute animated film features the voices of Bollywood and Hollywood movie stars including Vidya Balan, Rosanna Arquette, Mrunal Thakur & Sairah Kabir. How was it working with these artists and how is it helping with the reach of the feature film?
RD: Having a remarkable array of talented actresses bring the characters to life was critical, and we are lucky to have Vidya Balan, Mrunal Thakur, and Sairah Kabir voice the characters. Equally important that all the characters in the film and comic book are women. I saw Ms. Mrunal Thakur in “Love Sonia,” and her acting was powerful and compassionate, so the entire team envisioned her to voice Priya and bring the character to life.
The animation was something new for all of us, and very exciting. Although young people read comics, this is small in comparison to the number of people who watch animated films. So, it was important for us to take Priya’s journey to another level and a larger audience.
The comic includes Pakistan’s Burka Avenger (their female superhero)- a first where the two rival countries’ characters came together to fight the pandemic. This was a stroke of genius as it sends out a great message to the world that we all need to come together and fight this virus. How did this idea come along and what was the process like?
RD: I have known about the “Burka Avenger” for a long time and the amazing animated TV Series that has been playing in Pakistan. So, when we started this comic book we felt we needed to include her in the story. There are some obvious correlations — both are female superheroes who fight for women’s rights. Her name is Jiya and our character is named Priya.
Also, the virus does not respect borders so it was important two comic book female superhero characters come together to fight. The US Embassy in New Delhi helped arrange the meeting and it has been a pleasure working with the “Burka Avenger’s” team.
The comic book also uses AR. How important a role do you think technology plays today when it comes to creating awareness, spreading information, especially when the target audience is mainly children?
RD: Augmented reality is very popular now and much more than when we started in 2013. Especially for our main audiences which are teenage boys. We are able to embed a lot of information, interactive elements, and stories from survivors. I think it is a powerful and imaginative tool to make our comic book come to life. Augmented reality is still new in India, but becoming popular because of Instagram camera effects and Snapchat. We have an AR effect on Instagram called “Priya’s Mask” which people can try out. Lots of fun and important messages. AR turns a comic book into a pop-up book, so it makes complete sense.
On a technological level, we believe the use of augmented reality will have a significant impact on readers in India who are not as familiar with this approach. There is a huge “WOW” factor when readers first experience augmented reality. Our comic book was one of the first publications to use augmented reality in India and helped define the new frontiers of integrating books, exhibitions, and public art with augmented reality. We created augmented reality murals in Mumbai, Delhi, and Bangalore on the sides of buildings that were seen by millions of people.
SP: Tell us more about Rattapallax.
RD: Rattapallax started as a poetry magazine and now produces documentaries and comic books. We also produce transmedia storytelling and one of the innovators of augmented reality and comics. Rattapallax produced The Russian Woodpecker, which won the Grand Jury Prize at the 2015 Sundance Film Festival. Rattapallax’s most recent film, The Karma Killings, about the Nithari serial killings in Noida was out exclusively on Netflix worldwide. The Karma Killings is hailed as a “true crime watershed moment” in India (Arré)
SP: How do you think film and literature can contribute towards making society more resilient as we usher into this new year where in addition to political turmoils and social issues, we are still fighting the virus?
RD: Priya is a survivor of sexual violence. She is not a victim. She takes tragedy and overcomes fear to challenge herself and society. The big question is how will you come out of the pandemic? Will you be a survivor or a victim? This will determine your psychological state and the state of society.
SP: Any special message that you would like to give to India Currents readers?
RD: Overcome fear, and become the superhero you were meant to be.
You can follow Priya Shakti on Instagram at@powerofpriya and learn more about the character and comic books at https://www.priyashakti.com/.
Surabhi Pandey, a former Delhi Doordarshan presenter, is a journalist based in Singapore. She is the author of ‘Nascent Wings’ and ‘Saturated Agitation’ and has contributed to more than 15 anthologies in English and Hindi in India and Singapore. Website | Blog | Instagram
Sukham Blog – A monthly column focused on South Asian health and wellbeing.
“Goodbye,” said the Fox. “Now here is my little secret. It is very simple. It is only with the heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.” … “It is the time you lavished on your rose that makes your rose so important.” … “Men have forgotten this basic truth, but you must not forget it. For what you have tamed, you become responsible forever. You are responsible for your rose.”’
With these simple words, the Fox in Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s 1941 classic tale The Little Prince reveals that which makes life truly worth living: appreciating people for who they really are, building relationships based on deep and meaningful connections, and understanding the misplaced value most of us give to superficial and material things. Hearing the Little Prince recount this story, the pilot who has crash-landed his plane in the desert realizes the need to re-evaluate his own life.
Have you crash-landed in your own desert, your plane’s engine broken, and nowhere to go? Are you hoping for your own little prince to share his secret and guide you to a marvelous world?
How would you begin to design, or re-design your life and your well-being?
The application of design thinking – an approach used in product development to incorporate the end user’s needs and perspective – is not new. A good example is found in the book Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life by Bill Burnett & Dale Evans, both professors at Stanford. They guide working professionals through this process to build balanced, productive lives while finding joy and satisfaction in work, love, and play.
We are creatures of habit. We do many of the same things every day, from the moment we wake up until we go to bed at night, because we’ve trained ourselves – with or without intention – to be that way. It stands to reason that if we are to redesign our lives for better well-being, we will have to retrain ourselves to form new habits. Eleni Hope says that it is much easier to create the changes you crave when your habits empower and support your soul, values, and vision.
My friend Chaplain Dr. Bruce Feldstein, a board-certified chaplain, has developed a compelling approachto implement this re-design for well-being in a gradual, transformative process. He was an emergency medicine physician for 19 years before deciding that his true calling lay elsewhere, and trained to become a chaplain. He now serves as Founder and Director of Jewish Chaplaincy Services serving Stanford Medicine, a program of Jewish Family & Children’s Services, and is an Adjunct Clinical Professor at Stanford University’s School of Medicine. Drawing on the rich perspective he developed from decades of tending to the medical and spiritual needs of people, and additional insights from research and teaching in medicine, he developed what he terms spiritual fitness exercises to help us form these new habits and re-design our own well-being.
The key, says Chaplain Feldstein, is to “build practices that increase our capacity for meaning, purpose, and connectedness,” three essential determinants of well-being, and then “engage in these practices to fill our living with well-being.” Building these practices through repetition creates new habits.
Chaplain Feldstein recommends you begin with Four Questions a Day — inspired by the work of Rachel Naomi Remen MD, professor and pioneer of holistic and integrative medicine, and from research on gratitude. At the end of each day, spend 10 minutes of quiet time to contemplate and ask yourself:
What surprised me today?
What touched me today?
What inspired me today?
For what am I grateful?
Consider each question separately. Ask yourself the first question, reflect back on your day until you come to the first thing that surprised you, and jot it down. Then ask the second question, look back for the first thing that touched you, and make note of it. Do the same for something that inspired you, and for which you are grateful. Continue this exercise for three weeks and review your answers to see what you can learn about yourself. This foundational practice of discovery, wisdom, and well-being gradually “teaches us to live with open eyes and an open heart,” says Chaplain Feldstein, “it increases our capacity for well-being as we develop new ways of recognizing that which is positive and meaningful.”
Through this process, you will learn for yourself what the Fox taught the Little Prince!
The next step in this practice is to reflect on each of these questions as you go through your day. Set aside moments during your day to stop, reflect on the questions, and jot down your response. In doing so, identify and notice the particular response – surprise, being touched, inspired, and grateful. As you continue, you will gradually progress to the stage of noticing these reactions while in the experience, and from there to be able to voice an appropriate comment such as “that’s remarkable,” “I’m touched,” “you inspire me,” or “I’m so grateful you did that.” In this manner, you improve your ability to focus, sense, notice, allow, appreciate, wonder, reflect and find meaning. You interact with authenticity. This is a pathway to “fashion a world that is increasingly filled with well-being,” asserts Chaplain Feldstein. In addition to the Four Questions a Day practice, he recommends three other exercises to explore: Where Are You? Living Your Questions helps you discover the ‘aliveness’ within yourself; Key Relationships helps you stay emotionally buoyant; and Four Things I Want You To Be Sure To Know assists in healing relationships, finding peace, and dealing with the prospect of losing someone.
Mukund Acharya is a regular columnist for India Currents. He is also President and a co-founder ofSukham,an all-volunteer non-profit organization in the Bay Area that advocates for healthy aging within the South Asian community. Sukham provides curated information and resources on health and well-being, aging, and life’s transitions, including serious illness, palliative and hospice care, death, and bereavement. Contact the author at firstname.lastname@example.org
Whether you plod through Barack Obama’s 751-page political memoir The Promised Land (burnished with glossy photos) or enthuse through Annie Zaidi’s 159-page personal memoir Bread, Cement, Cactus (replete with line drawings), you will be rewarded with these three paradoxes:
Home is away;
Insiders are outsiders; and
To be vulnerable is to be powerful.
Given that few of us will ever make the White House our home, let’s give Obama a fleeting glance and dedicate our attention to this précis of Zaidi’s award-winning (Cambridge University’s Nine Dots Prize) thesis on belonging and dislocation. But first, let’s open where both authors end, with their metaphors of home: Zaidi likens it to a morning mist, and Obama references an evening commute.
After having visited the SEAL team and pilots who were involved in killing Osama Bin Laden, Obama returns to his home at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. From the perch of Marine One, on his way to the West Wing, Obama writes: “The helicopter began its gentle turn, due north across the Mall. The Washington Monument suddenly materialized on one side, seeming almost close enough to touch; on the other side, I could see the seated figure of Lincoln … I looked down at the street below, still thick with rush-hour traffic – fellow commuters, I thought, anxious to get home.” Even after a decade in Washington D. C., the Hawaiian remains on an island with two dead presidents and “fellow commuters” to keep him company; when he speaks of home in The Promised Land, it is with the lonely voice of someone doing the job of a former president. The White House for him was his Karm Bhoomi, his place of work. A house that slaves built could never be a home for Obama and his family to fully inhabit.
Zaidi aches for a different kind of home, a place where one truly belongs, one’s Janm Bhoomi, one’s birth home; this is the mitti, or soil, that you breathe in after you’ve moved elsewhere and the earthy scent after a rain reminds you of home; this is the soil where your body or ashes might return after death. In that home, you are never away, no matter which diaspora you are part of; in that home, you are always welcome as an insider, no matter the superficial outsiderness of your being; in that home, you feel powerful in your vulnerability, like a baby in her mother’s lap. You are loyal to your land of birth; and that land is loyal to you.
But, as Zaidi eloquently writes, “For a person to give her loyalty to the land, to trust those who create and enforce laws, safety is a prerequisite. One essential aspect to this illusion is familiarity: systems functioning as we expect them to, people talking in tongues we understand.”
Zaidi begins her memoir in Rajasthan, my own ancestral home. She weaves in words from people talking in tongues that are slipping away from my family now that almost all of us have left our desert origins: mitti, colony, Aravalli, Sirohi, tribal, Garasia, Rabadi, Bhil, Mt. Abu, bigha, panchayat, thikana, odni, gur, imarti, mofussil, nanihal, mulk, vatan, zameen, ghar. And that’s just in the first 25 pages. The list grows as the pages flow. I feel at home reading these words naturally inserted into the serious text; underneath the political writing, there’s a leavening of sentimentality that is neither mawkish nor falsely nostalgic of better times that probably never existed. Instead, Zaidi simply acknowledges the challenge of rediscovering home once it is lost.
Zaidi’s professional life takes her to Karm Bhoomis such as Bombay, Delhi, and Gujarat. There is a sad episode in Gujarat after the 2002 riots, alternatively called the 2002 Gujarat violence and the Gujarat pogrom; Zaidi prefers calling the inter-communal violence a pogrom. As so often is the case in India, there is both a domino effect and dissemblance as part of the political play that proves tragic for ordinary people. The riots in Gujarat began with the psychological violence associated with the demolition of the Babri Masjid in Ayodhya; it proceeded to the Godhra railway station where a fire of disputed origin engulfed four coaches and took the lives of 58 Hindu pilgrims returning from their pilgrimage to Ayodhya; the political conflagration grew across then Chief Minister Modi’s Gujarat as Hindu stalwarts claimed that the fire was instigated by Pakistan’s intelligence agency aided and abetted by local Muslims; and then suddenly a violent tragedy of numbing numbers struck Gujarat, home once to M. K. Gandhi, the apostle of nonviolence:
200 police officers dead while trying to control the violence;
230 mosques and 274 dargahs destroyed by the violent;
1,044 dead, of which 790 were Muslim and 254 Hindu;
150,000 people displaced during the violence; and
Countless acts of heroism committed by Hindus, Dalits and tribals who tried to protect Muslims from the violence.
Rather than retelling this oft-told story, Zaidi reports on her own reportage. While in Gujarat, she became self-conscious of the tabeez her grandmother had gifted her. Because the amulet was “inscribed with a verse from the Quran … with a subtle gesture, I tucked it out of sight, lest the script give me away as one of ‘those people.’ People who had been shown their place. People whose homes had been burnt down. Women who had been raped.” After years of putting the tabeez away out of fear, and years of resultant shame, Zaidi began wearing it again visibly. “Because, as much as home is a place of safety, it is also a place where you are visible.”
Perhaps for Zaidi, her writing is a similar amulet, affording her paper-bound protection against evil, danger, and the disease of religious intolerance. Since my college days, I have dedicated much of my reading and writing to reclaiming India; this has been my way of belonging to a house that my ancestors built. I claim a birthright to all parts of India, and in my dozens of trips back home, I’ve always felt welcome in all parts of my matra bhoomi, my motherland. However, Mother India is not as welcoming to all of her children and grandchildren.
I have two friends who have experienced the welcome mat being obstructed for one spouse, but not the other. Both are educators: one born in India to a Hindu father and a Muslim mother; the other born in the United Kingdom to Muslim parents who at Partition moved from India to Pakistan. The latter is unlikely to get a visa to visit India … even though both parents were born in the same India as mine.
I feel both outraged and sad: outraged that government policy poisoned by religious intolerance has made my house of belonging too small for my friends; sad that the India that I’ve spent decades reclaiming is slipping away from me.
When I was much younger, I would feel a tinge of shame when swimming in public. The source of the shame? My sacred thread. Shame was a childish response to the low risk of American xenophobes targeting this symbol of my otherness, my Brahminical ancestry. I can empathize with, but can’t fully imagine, what it would be like to live in my country of birth (or my adopted land) and feel fear of wearing my version of Zaidi’s tabeez. Perhaps I am not brave enough to let my imagination tread such dangerous waters.
Zaidi’s brave book has many memorable quotes about home. Here are three that remind me that from the land of our birth to the abode of our love to our final resting place we all look for a place we can call home:
“Zameen … has dual connotations. It means land, but also a certain psychological environment. It is soil, mood, air, culture … You make it as much as you need it to make yourself.”
“Home, they say, is where the heart is. If home is a location of love, then in my country, home is a guilty secret.”
“Home is where others come looking for you, in life and after.”
The last pages of Bread, Cement, Cactus close with Zaidi’s misty metaphor: “Sometimes I think of home as morning mist. I see it as wispy strands engulfing around me. I feel its cool fingers on my face, but it is beyond my grasp.” She then proceeds to list the “moving picture” of her life that she evoked in the previous 140 pages. Then, suddenly, she writes, “Like mist, these things disappear. Rivers and hills too may disappear within my own lifetime. But like a train of thought, like a film of moving images, something of home remains within.”
Subsequent to Independence in 1947, Indians like me were born into a promising land that was their own. Over the past three-quarters of a century, many, like Annie Zaidi, have worked to have India deliver on its promissory note of a pluralist democracy. If that proves to be elusive, then perhaps the only option remaining to us romantics is to return to our promised land after our final breath.
For RCO’s granddaughter Eshni and her parents as they make a house their home.
Dr. Rajesh C. Oza, is a Change Management Consultant working with clients across the world; he also facilitates the development of MBA students’ interpersonal dynamics at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business.
During the pandemic my daughters and I have been spending a lot of time in the kitchen cooking up a storm. One day we set out to cook a family favorite dish, vegetable pulao.I tell them we’ll be making it from my grandmother’s recipe.
“How come you don’t talk more about her?” my daughters ask. That began my journey to piece together the story of a remarkable woman.
As with most things I began with my mom.
“Tell me about patti (grandmother).”
My mother says, “Amma could whip up the most delicious pulao and raita. The badi elaichi left a lingering taste.”
It’s not easy to get my octogenarian mother to talk about her childhood years. “I was eleven when my mother died,” she says.
“She must have been 40?” I ask. My mother nods silently. Losing a mother at such a young age must have been a crippling blow. On one of the few occasions she’s spoken of it, my mother rued, “…at least I have some memories of my mother but your aunt was just a baby.”
I learned that patti was married at 13 to a 20-year-old law student studying in Madras. My grandfather went on to become an accountant general in the British India government. This meant they moved every few years. My grandmother had to set up households in cities across north India such as Delhi, Jaipur, Jodhpur and Simla. Many of my grandfather’s colleagues were Englishmen and patti was expected to interact with their wives.
How did a shy thirteen-year old girl from Thanjavur hold her own in an unfamiliar world? It wasn’t just a matter of stepping into a new environment but getting comfortable, and even being adept at playing hostess in social events that my grandfather’s job required them to host. This even while she had seven children of her own to raise.
The family album shows patti as a doe-eyed woman with a gentle expression. Understandably my mother’s memories of her mom are somewhat fragmented. Yet several incidents from her mother’s life have stayed with her, such as her explaining “how to make murukkus in her broken English to the wives of my father’s colleagues.”
My grandmother got comfortable enough to play tennis in her six-yards saree with these women, even while conforming to the conservative practices of her in-laws.
“She would change into a nine yards sari in the train before disembarking in Chennai!” my mother chuckles.
It wasn’t just her recipes that got handed down. “Amma would shoo us children out of the living room when the announcement for the music program came on the radio,” says my mother. “She’d ask us to come back once the music began so that we could guess the name of the raga being played!” My grandmother was a die-hard fan of Carnatic music, a love she passed on to her children and leading to my own career as a classical musician.
Even as my mother recounts her memories, I can sense some of what’s unsaid – the challenges of being a woman raising multiple children, even while juggling conservative in-laws in a patriarchal and colonial society. So taking a break or falling ill was not an option. Which is why when she caught tuberculosis, it affected the entire family. Long periods of staying at a sanatorium ensued as she recuperated. Despite seeming improvement, patti never fully recovered.
“Streptomycin became available a few months after her death,” my mother’s voice breaks. “It was too late for her.”
I sense it’s her 11-year old self speaking. We are both silent. I reflect on a young girl’s journey from a southern city of India and the legacy she left behind for future generations of women. While we celebrate women across the world as role models, I wonder if we look hard enough in our own backyards for inspiration?
“Ma, what do I do now?” my daughter’s voice draws me to the present. “Give the rice and veggies one last swirl and let it cook covered.”
As my daughter turns the pulao with a wooden ladle, I notice the thin gold bangles on her hand. It’s a gift from my mother.
‘Were they my grandmother’s?’ I wonder. Tracing the rim of those bangles, I find myself whispering, “This is like the armor of a warrior.”
My patti’s name was Meenakshi.
Chitra Srikrishna is a Carnatic musician based in Boston images: paintings by S. Elayaraja