Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
Freedom, agency, belonging
It’s Saturday evening, and I can hear the planes roar in the sky. I’m not surprised. This has been happening for the past few Saturdays. The Singapore Air Force is practicing its parade maneuvers. Red and white flags are hanging in the balconies of most flats, and the entrance to our condo is also decorated with red and white lights. All this happens each year as the city-state of Singapore prepares for August 9, its National Day. This year is extra special because it marks Singapore’s 60th birthday.
In India, where I was born, and in Singapore, where I now live, August is a month when patriotic fervor is at its peak. When I lived in the United States of America as a young adult for fourteen years, I remember watching July 4th celebrations. Having resided in three democracies of various sizes over the years, I have given some thought to what freedom really means.
What does freedom really mean?
My parents were born in an India that was under British rule. They were not old enough to participate in India’s freedom struggle. Yet the benefits of coming of age in a country that was coming into its own as an independent nation impacted not just them but the generations that followed.
I rarely pause to ponder the significance of India’s Independence Day, because the reality of life in a nation governed by another was a distant concept, one I studied in history textbooks in school.
Freedom, to me, has been something I took for granted, no different from the assumption that the sun will rise every day.
The ability to travel as I please, to change my country of residence, my job, my clothes, and even my opinion, feels as natural to me as breathing.
For a large portion of my adult life, I have been labeled as a non-resident Indian. Yet, I know that simply moving to another country (or even changing my nationality) doesn’t mean I can change my lineage. My Indianness is etched in my features and my accent, in my food preferences and in the way I see the world.
“Freedom is my birthright. I must have it,” said Bal Gangadhar Tilak.
For one who does not have it, freedom is a cause worth fighting for. But for those born in a free country, what does freedom really mean?
I recently realised that my understanding of freedom was wrong. We often confuse freedom and agency – at least I did.
The myth of agency
The ability to act on the urge to move (to a different job), to choose (who I marry), to support (a cause), is not freedom but agency. A change in laws or leadership may promise greater freedom, but does it always lead to agency?
In theory, freedom affords us the baseline ability to consider these actions to be in the realm of possibility. It is like having access to fertile soil to plant your seeds. But for the seeds to germinate, to put your ideas into practice, to enable your desires to materialise, one needs to have a sense of agency, the belief that “I can do it“. You need an ecosystem that allows you to exercise your choices.
Freedom without agency is pure rhetoric.
Agency is a prerequisite for hope. And hope is something we all need.
Think of people all over the world who live in ‘free’ countries but lack the agency for self-determination because of how things are structured. Think about people within your country, your organization, or even your own home, who may be legally free but cannot choose even the smallest things because of the way society, your workplace, or your home operates.
Why women hesitate
In the past year, a few of my friends had to sort things out after the death of their father. In every case, the widowed mother was educated, lived in urban India, and was ostensibly ‘free’. Yet, when it came to what happened next – where she would live, how she would manage her finances, and what she wanted to do in the next phase of her life, the elderly woman had no say. The children decided for her.
While I cannot comment on their personal situations, the one common comment I heard was “My mother is easy to manage”. By this, they meant the women were flexible, didn’t put their foot down, or make unnecessary demands. They acquiesced for the greater good. This made the transition smoother.
But it made me sad. Even in a free country, social conditioning, especially for women, forms the biggest barrier to agency. We need freedom, of course, but we need to ensure there is agency as well. Otherwise, it is just lip service.
Inclusion and belonging in a foreign country
When I landed in Singapore a dozen years ago, a few weeks before Diwali, I saw “Happy Deepavali” signs flashing on public buses. I was pleasantly surprised to see my cultural festival publicly acknowledged and included in a country that was not India. There is something endearing about inclusion. Because inclusion is the foundation of belonging.
Every year, Diwali is a public holiday in Singapore. In the weeks leading up to the festival, the Little India neighborhood is lit up. As I shop for sweets and diyas, knowing that I get a day off to celebrate my festival, I feel excited about our family tradition of an annual Diwali party at our home, where we invite friends and colleagues from different countries – kids enjoy firecrackers, adults relish the food, and everyone loves to dress up.
The true joy of belonging, reinforced by this yearly family tradition, arises from our ability to exercise our agency in celebrating our festival the way we want to. Freedom, inclusion, and agency thus form the pillars of belonging. When we feel that we belong in a family, we are committed to its well-being. For organizations and countries that make their people feel like they belong, they reap the rewards of loyalty as a natural outcome.
To be free, to be included, to belong, to love and be loved – these are basic needs that contribute to individual flourishing and lead to strong social networks.
Whether we celebrate a national holiday or a religious or culturally significant day, I wish all men and women get the agency to move towards a more fulfilling life at each stage.
Instead of forwarding nationalistic slogans, let us enable the agency of at least one person who needs our support.
The world will be better for it.
Have you helped someone have agency in their life?