With her enthusiastic personality and open demeanor, Hetal Vasavada doesn’t give off the vibe of someone who’s enjoyed spots in Bon Appétit and Food and Wine magazines, competed on MasterChef, or has an astonishing 125K Instagram followers.
In the wake of her highly anticipated second cookbook drop last October (Desi Bakes can be purchased at her website Milk & Cardamom), Hetal graciously discussed her choices to collaborate with content creators and other influencers, and how she manages her mental health given everything she juggles.
Sharing some of her earliest, core cooking memories, her eyes light up as she relates her mother and aunts drying papad on old saris in the driveway and on the deck on a 100-degree day.
“It was a thing amongst the family where we all made it together. [Today] there’s so much going on in everyone’s lives that doing something as a community it’s hard. But Rhut and Elara (Vasavada’s husband and daughter), they’re my community. They’re my sous chefs, as my mom did with me and my sisters, and my aunts. [I’m] passing that tradition on.”
It’s Not a Pie
Ideas about community reach beyond family traditions for Vasavada. I mentioned that folks in the industry speak of how she eagerly lifts up others. “A lot of this comes from how I grew up. My parents put me in every Hindu school you could think of. Some of the first lessons they taught you were to help others. My friends [also] shaped a lot of who I am. They’re cheerleaders, such uplifting, kind people.”
I asked her what made those generous qualities stick with her, especially given the fame she now enjoys. She responded, “I don’t want anyone to feel that I’m friends with them because of their resume or what they’re capable of doing for me. Everyone I’ve ever worked with or praised or helped with a project has come back and brought me with them.”
And Vasavada does the same. Recently, she was asked to participate in a dinner for Meena Harris and Padma Lakshmi, and Vasavada requested to bring Naidu Wines to pair with her dessert. She also takes the time and effort to amplify businesses on her Instagram. “I really believe we can all help each other. There’s more than enough. We all have our own special sauce. As long as you’re not stealing other people’s recipes and content, I’m happy to help. I feel so lucky we’re in the Bay Area. Most of the folks are collaborative versus competitive. It’s a different culture and mindset.”
Pushing Back on the Myth of ‘Perfection’
How Vasavada got to this point in her life is a well-known story. She’s held jobs from a rideshare business she dreamt up (well before Uber and Lyft) to being a nanny, cooking dinners for families, waitressing, decorating cheesecakes, and working the donation call line at her college. She did what she had to do to stay afloat – what she describes as her ‘Hetal Hustle’- and that’s worked out for her in spades. Following her turn on MasterChef, she started her blog, wrote her first cookbook, “Milk and Cardamom,” and created content. But the early years weren’t easy.
Being South Asian and the eldest daughter of immigrants, she shares that there was a lot of pressure on her to be perfect. “Baking was a place where I could say, ‘Even if it’s not perfect, it tastes good.’ I could have a kind of zen, not worry about anything else in my life. And at the end, I’d have a cake I would get to eat, but also share with my friends. [Baking] definitely gave me a purpose. My parents are super chill. The pressure I put on myself to succeed was because I had no net. There was no going to mommy and daddy for money in the future. I failed my way, I struggle-busted my way into this career.”
Witnessing those missteps and challenges is one of the most captivating aspects of following Vasavada. She seems not very different from us, except on a larger stage, and we can feel inspired by how she presents her real life. I asked her about the stressors associated with her success and how she manages them.
“We all go through it – insecurity, there’s a toxicity. I struggle with following influencers or content creators who make it look like their life is perfect. They’re the perfect moms who make the perfect meals, the perfect kitchen, and [have] the perfect husband, in the perfect house, and the perfect clothes, perfect car, you know? They’re creating aspirational content. People in the comments will say, ‘That’s so perfect. You’re the most wholesome family.’ [Those are] unrealistic ideas of what life is and how it will and can look like for you.”
I questioned how she avoided getting derailed by these insecurities or allowed the number of likes on a post to be the sole metric driving her content decisions. “I spiral every once in a while,” she confessed. “I signed with an agency, and the focus was on growth and branding. My growth is slow and steady. I’ve been at 125-126K [followers on Instagram] for the past 4-5 months. [But] I don’t want to chase the algorithm. No one needs the hundredth version of a cucumber salad or the five-hundredth version of a Dubai chocolate bar. It just doesn’t bring me joy. I get excited from creating original items that are specific to me. I have a branded aesthetic that people know, which I fully appreciate. So I just decided I’m going to post what I want when I want. It has affected me, [and] I’m not getting as many brand deals as I used to, but I feel more at peace mentally. I’m not feeling like I’m chasing something all the damn time.”
I mention that in her messy-to-clean videos, Vasavada models getting dirty in the service of love, creation, and yumminess. She remarked, “I remember saying, ‘This is a working kitchen, this is not an Instagram kitchen. This is not a place I come and pretend to cook for two minutes and then leave. Then a staff comes and cleans up after me.’ I have ADHD, and I get overwhelmed. So [in the new house] we built the kitchen with sections and zones so I don’t [feel] ‘Oh my god, this is too much.’ So I would share [the mess] to remind people, ‘Hey, it’s ok. My kitchen looks like this, too.’ Failure is ok. That’s another thing that I see kids, even adults, struggle with. I share my fails [because] my goal is to lower the barrier of entry to getting people into the kitchen, cooking, and baking.”
Hetal’s Future Recipes for Success
“Please go buy my cookbook, ‘Desi Bakes,’ and follow me on Instagram (@milkandcardamom),” she smiles broadly. “ I’m going to share a lot more content on my Instagram where I am talking about baking basics. My Runways to Recipes series [is up], where I’m taking a lot of Indian designers and creating desserts inspired by them. Just going deeper in my creativity. Share, bake, and enjoy, and go to my website and my Substack!”
I asked her if she was going to get a breather before releasing another book. “Yeah, but I’m picking it now and starting in early summer. The next book is going to be more savory.” And as she looks further into the future? “‘Baking with Ba.’” She laughs. “No one hates a little granny who bakes. It’ll be fine.”
Certainly, we can imagine that scenario because, with her ‘Hetal Hustle’ in full swing, Vasavada shows no signs of slowing down.
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